Thursday, January 5, 2012

A New Year's Gift

Happy New Year’s! I received a gift from Jesus on Sunday, and I want to share it with you.
We had a wonderful Christmas, enjoying intimate family time here at home before I took the children to visit the grandparents while Daddy went back to work. The time visiting was hectic but so blessed by love and laughter! Coming home was a great shock to my system, as my husband quickly noticed I needed a vacation from my vacation.
In fact, for a couple of days, all of the things I needed to accomplish before the new week could begin were swimming in circles in my head, not unlike those sugarplums dancing just a week prior. I thought about them, complained to myself how much there was to do, and did... Absolutely.Nothing!
I was overwhelmed, much like a deer in headlights, a character trait of mine I often lament. There was conference work to be done, homeschooling plans to make, bills to pay, laundry to do, email to answer, and football to watch. It was simply inconceivable to me how I survive on a daily basis with so many responsibilities.
Confession. I did not do absolutely nothing. I watched football, drank Shiner, and napped for a couple of days. And I did a few loads of laundry, so we all had clean necessities.
Then, it was Sunday. Sunday, of course, is a gift in and of itself, but all I could see was Mass, more football, more Shiner, and more napping! Hooray! The rest was way too much to face. If I ignored it, would it all go away?
As these thoughts were swimming in my head, I walked into Mass somewhere just before communion.
Explanation. Unfortunately, my youngest child has not yet mastered a good night’s sleep, and so if he falls asleep during the thirty-minute drive to Sunday Mass, we let him sleep. The alternative is waking him up, which results in a grumpy boy who will not stay quiet or still in Mass anyway and must be taken out.
Anyway, I say my Rosary in the van and try to pray while waiting for him to wake up. Usually, I get to hear at least half of the homily, because he naps about 45 minutes total. On the Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God, however, he slept longer. So, we walk in, stay at the back, and I try to enter into worship for the last few minutes of Mass.
I try to shed all the moaning I just did in the van, telling God I just have no motivation to get started on any of the daunting tasks in front of me in the days to come. Jesus, please help me, I beg. With that slight opening of my heart, He enters. An angelic voice from the choir begins singing the Ave, and it hits me.
None of my concerns have anything to do with this.
I am before God Almighty working out my salvation, and nothing else is nearly as important.
At all.
This gift, this realization, gave me new life. It was just a moment, but on my knees, snuggling a still groggy toddler, gazing upon His Body and Blood in the Eucharist, I knew I could do it all for Him. I could do it all with Jesus.
That night, after a day of naps, Shiner, and football (and some giggly family time), I made a to-do list, and I dove in head first. A few days later, I have still not made a sizable dent in that list, but these tasks will not defeat me. One thing at a time, He will see me through.
Is your list too long? How do you maintain the proper perspective while dealing with the day to day? Jesus, I trust in You!


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