Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Sometimes He Just Needs My Words

(blogger is not letting me post photos again, sorry)

I have a love affair with words. I like to speak them. I like to read them. I like to write them. I like to hear them. But, it occurred to me today when I was rocking the baby that my prayer life as of late has been without my own words.

Now, that is not always wrong. Different seasons in our lives require different methods of prayer. The Lord will lead us to pray the Rosary when He feels we need the meditation. He will lead us to pray in silence when our spiritual life needs such food. And, He will invite us to share the depths of our hearts with him, too.

My prayer life used to be full of my words. For many years, I spent most of my prayer time pouring out my heart to God, and it was good. At some point, however, I noticed that my words ceased being words of faith and praise but merely words of worry and whine. So, I stopped.

I turned to spiritual reading and meditating on Scripture and the Rosary, all very good things. Of course, with a new baby, I lost my rhythm of these prayers. My mother's hear merely exhaled aspirations throughout my days...and sleepless nights, also good. About a month ago, however, I began longing for more.

And, in keeping with my realization that it took me about a month to get started in this new year of 2011, today, I hear the Lord ask for my words again. My own words formed in this mother's heart and spoken in the voice of my soul while I rock a fussy baby to sleep once again. After all, I had become frustrated unable to hold a Bible or book without little hands grabbing fistfuls of delicate pages.

He needs to hear my words. In fact, He longs for them like I long to be close to Him. Sometimes nothing else will work to bring us closer together but the words that I conceive in my heart. Lord, help me to speak words of faith and praise in prayer today.

What season of prayer are you called to these days?

1 comment:

Erin said...

I have been called to contemplative prayer. I guess that i had never really understood or was able to enter into contemplative prayer until I experienced it on a silent retreat I attended in November. It is somewhat difficult, for me, because it requires a stillness of your soul and with 2 little boys around the house, there is always lots going on, but it is just a "BEING" with Jesus. Meeting Him in the depths of my soul. It results in the most profound peace, which is really sustaining. I've got to be careful, though, because i sometimes find myself wanting to run away from my duties to meet Him there and I know He doesn't want that.

God Bless!